Letting go…we are at that pivotal point, my girl and I, where the mom steps aside and allows the daughter to fully call all the shots for her life. It’s that “do I step in or do I not” place, where I see she’s ready and I’m almost forcing her to go forward, and at the same time I’m holding on tight.
My special girl has been helped beyond what any typical child would ever need. I have protected her in an unknown world of doctors and illness, traumas and unknown outcomes. Her world, our world, has been at times, life or death. And so my momma bear has practiced protecting her at world class levels.
She, too, has lived being protected and having things done for her because she physically could not do for herself. And now as she emerges stronger and more able, she is both ready for more and comfortable with doing more of the same.
I’m encouraging her to follow her heart, to dig deep and find what she wants. After all these years of being taken care of and having all of her needs met, that is incredibly difficult for her.
One things she’s very clear about is her desire for a new school this year. It’s an amazing private school where she picks her own schedule and learns one on one. She is inspired to go there and feels it to her core that it’s the best school for her.
Mom, on the other hand, is struggling. I know it’s the best school for her, but that protective side of me doesn’t want to let go. It is very different. What if it doesn’t work for her? What if they can’t teach to her abilities? What if her schedule is crazy? What if she doesn’t have any friends? What if, what if, what if???
Whoa there, momma. This is your girl you’re talking about. This is one powerful little lady. Her mom’s no slacker either.
I know that when I focus on something, and really hold my attention on all the positive aspects of it, that’s the way it turns out. Every time.
So fears, take a back seat and quiet down! Today I’m trusting that my girl knows best what works for her, and that it’s going to turn out better than I imagined. I’m giving my attention to this being the best year of school ever. I’m making a list of all the great things about this school and our girl going there.
Instead of me showing her, I’m letting her excitement lead my way.